Walking One's Own Path: A Road To Lapis Philosophorum

     As we all get older we slowly begin to feel the gradual effects of time on our bodies and our minds, like the ticking of a clock in the back of our head that gets louder & louder with age. It's as if we start feeling like we're racing against a clock and we feel as though we must finish something, accomplish something, or just do something, anything before time runs out, but what? What is it that we feel we must do?

   Perhaps it's because we have not been living our own live's, we've been living the life of someone else. Like a path that maybe our mother or father decided for us, or perhaps you've been living the life of a previously written script like that of a tradition, religion or culture that has it's own unique code of conduct & expectations. Whatever the case may be, are you doing what you enjoy? If you're not doing what you enjoy but you don't care then I ask, has your life brought value or meaning to yourself or others?

     Not everyone has the same wants or desires in life but one thing we all have is the ability to question everything, including ourselves. If one is truly content with one's life then I am not addressing you, but if you have even the slightest feeling of discontentment then I urge you to turn inward and ask yourself, "Am I on my own path?"

     I'm not writing from the perspective of someone who has been walking his own path, nay, I am speaking from the point of view of someone who has spent his whole life trying to walk an imaginary line between what is expected of me by society and family while simultaneously trying to be my own person who walks his own path, making his own waves. In hindsight I can tell you from my own experience, this does not seem to be possible. You either live for yourself or you sacrifice a piece of yourself for the societal machine that requires a life sentence of menial and oftentimes meaningless tasks, all for the sake of a company that is impersonal towards your needs.

     Only recently have I embarked upon the unpopular task of living my own life on my own terms, and I can say from the short time I've been doing it... it's the most liberating and freeing feeling I have ever felt. Money takes a back seat to my enjoyment and my spirit basks in the holiness of every moment,  within every breath of my existence. I have time to stop and the smell the flowers, I have desires and ambitions again, my virility and energy have increased and my outlook on life has never been more optimistic. This is the closest I have ever been to experiencing an Alchemizing of my Spirit from it's baser instinctual need to survive and into something more profound, something... transcendental.

     It's in this feeling that I see a path towards a new awakening within myself. What that means, I can only guess, but if what is said is true, "Seek and ye shall find", then I am on a journey of finding out & you are on that journey with me. Living vicariously through me, seeing my trials and tribulations, perhaps you too will decide to make your own path and together we can all transcend the Prima Materia of our inner being and turn it into the Lapis Philosophorum of our ultimate beingness. To become one with our Higher Selves & to show the way by being the way. No one hears the words we speak, they see the actions we perform, the way that we are, they see authenticity and inauthenticity. Which one are you?